Thankful

This is not our first thanksgiving away from home, but it is our first Thanksgiving as our own little family with the two kids. As I was preparing our turkey dinner (which was delish, thank you very much Alton Brown!) there were so many instances that made me thankful today. Here's a brief list of the things I thought about today... enjoy, and Happy Thanksgiving everyone!

multiple white onesies- When Reuben blew out of his today I was able to just throw it away!
Alton Brown- He taught me to cook and made our wonderful meal possible!
video chat- Seriously can't imagine life without it!
wine- I mean, do I really need to explain that one?
Mickey Mouse- He can entertain my kid for hours if I let him.
not being preggo- Happy to not be baking a kiddo!
traditions- I love our holiday traditions. They are constant in a crazy world.
my hubby's job- It's great to see him in a job after going without last year.

And of course, all the usual sentimental "thankfuls"; my family, my husband, my kids, etc., etc.

Now on to the holiday season! Filled with homemade stockings, Christmas cookies, mulled wine,  and Bing Crosby. Yay!

You're gonna miss this

Driving in the car today, I heard the song by Trace Adkins "You're gonna miss this" and I thought, I hope I'm able to remember everything from these days. When you're a parent you endure sleepless nights, dirty diapers, spit-ups, blowouts, broken sunglasses, teething, temper tantrums and stress like you've never imagined.

Yet, after cleaning poop from three sets of pj's, listening to my son scream for 45 minutes straight while I had a headache and hearing that blasted Navy bear song for the bazillionth time, I came out of my daughter's room tonight with tears in my eyes because I know that all too soon these days will be behind me.

On Wednesday my daughter will start her first soccer lessons. In three weeks my son will start eating solid foods. I finished packing up all of my maternity clothes to be given away. In five years time, both of my kids will be in school. And I know myself. I know that when I walk my son into his first day of kindergarden, I'm going to wish that he was back at home with me, smiling at the red bird on his play mat.

I've lost my figure, my sanity and countless hours of sleep. I've given up wine for 9 months (twice!). I now eat my mac and cheese with sweet potatoes hidden in it. I watch more Mickey Mouse Clubhouse than Food Network.

But I've also twirled around the house, dancing with my daughter. I've laughed as my son stopped drinking his bottle today so he could smile at me. I've cuddled with both kiddos wrapped under a blanket early this morning. And I've sung lullabies to my babies every night .

I'm trying to take in every moment. I'm trying to cling on to every little detail, to make certain it is locked in my memory forever. on those days where I just want to throw something through a window, I try to remember how quickly they grow up. I try to remember how my heart melted when we were all curled up together watching cartoons in bed. Because one of these days, I'm gonna miss this.

What memories do you hold dear? What are you gonna miss when your kiddos are all grown up?

Sticks and Stones

You're stupid. You're ugly. You're retarded. You're gross. You talk funny. You're a giant. You're a wimp. I hate you. I wish you were never born. You're fat. No one likes you.

I just found out today that my little sister is being bullied at school. My wonderful, kind, loving little sister is being told that she's fat, ugly and stupid. It breaks my heart. I've literally been crying off and on all day just thinking about it. You'd be hard pressed to find a lovelier person than my sister. She is the most attentive, forgiving, merciful kind hearted little girl I've ever had the pleasure to meet.

She's told me about people who have hurt her before and instead of being sad about it, she said they only acted that way because they didn't know what it was like to be loved. She felt sorry for them. 

But these words have broken her spirit. They have made her feel worthless. I can't stand it because I love her so much. All I want to do is hold her in my arms and tell her how incredibly special she is.

Personally, I wanted to give them all a good spanking. How can kids be so cruel? How can they say such awful things to such a good person? Don't they know how their words will change her?

When I was a little girl I once wore a purple sweatshirt to school. A boy said I looked stupid, like Barney the dinosaur. Of course, being me, I just hit him. But that didn't help the matter. It just made him more mean because now he didn't want to look bad because a girl beat him up. He and his friends laughed at me all day calling me "Barney".

I threw that sweatshirt away. It was one of my favorite shirts. My mom bought it for me on one of our very rare trips to the store with just the two of us. (There were five of us growing up, so that was a big treat to get one on one time with a parent.) I didn't even wear the color purple again until highschool. Even now, I only have one purple shirt, and I only wear it under a green shirt as an accent color.

Now, I'm not saying that I'm still afraid of being called "Barney", but I am saying that one person's hurtful remark can have a significant, lifelong effect on you.

Parents, if your kid is being bullied or is being the bully, the answer isn't to ignore it and hope it goes away. There are more important things at stake here than someone deciding to never wear purple again. If bullying has reared its ugly head in your life in any way, talk about it, get help, make it stop. Let's give our kids a better life than the one we had.

But as for now, since I'm on the other side of the country and can't give my sister the hug I so desperately desire to give her, I hope these words from someone much better than myself can help to comfort her. I hope they help you too.

Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother's womb. I thank you, High God - you're breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! 

~ Psalm 139:13

For I know the plans I have for you, says the Lord. They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and hope.

 ~Jeremiah 29:11

What's the price of two or three pet canaries? Some loose change, right? But God never overlooks a single one. And he pays even greater attention to you, down to the last detail - even numbering the hairs on your head! So don't be intimidated by all this bully talk. 

~ Luke 12:7

I have loved you with an everlasting love. With unfailing love I have drawn you to myself.

~Jeremiah 31:3

My response is to get down on my knees before the Father, this magnificent Father who parcels out heaven and earth. I ask him to strengthen you by his Spirit - not a brute strength but a glorious inner strength - that Christ will live in you as you open the door and invite him in. And I ask him that with both feet planted firmly on love, you'll be able to take in with all followers of Jesus the extravagant dimensions of Christ's love.

~ Ephesians 3:16-21

To find out more about bullying visit
http://www.stopbullying.gov/index.html 

Commitment?

Omg! Kim Kardashian and her new hubby Kris are getting a divorce! Shock. Surprise. Oh, the horror. Can you sense my sarcasm yet?

It's been all over the news this week. Another celebrity couple call it quits after only 72 days of marriage. Normally people say, 'oh that's sad'. But this time I've just seen outrage... and rightly so. It's ridiculous that they were able to take something that is meant to be a holy covenant and throw it away like leftovers that have finally gone off.

The week before I got a letter from my pen pal back in Ohio, a little girl I had the opportunity to pray for all last year. Her parents just got divorced and she said to me in her letter, 'I'm glad we have something in common. But, I mean, what is it like? Is it weird or what?' My heart broke for her. I felt all the swell of emotions from when my parents went through it and I just wanted to wrap her in my arms.

Because even the most well intentioned divorce tears a child apart. Even if it truly is the best thing for the parents, it still destroys the family and there is nothing you can do to fix that. You can put a band-aid on it, you can learn to live with it, but everyone will always carry that scar with them. And for the kids, it will always effect the relationships they have, the way they deal with stress, the way they view parenting as adults... it's life changing.

Anyway, it made me think, what the heck is wrong with us? Half of marriages in the US end in divorce, and no, I'm not exaggerating.

Now, I know there are some situations that warrant divorce. Cheating, abuse, etc., but those are a small percentage of the 50%. The real issue is that people don't know what it means to be committed to one another. They think a wedding is a wonderful and grand party and forget that it signifies the beginning of a lifelong relationship.

When you say those vows and sign those papers you are saying that you will stick by that person no matter what. You are saying that your life now belongs to them and they are saying that their life now belongs to you. You are telling the world that the two of you are one.

You should stick by them when money troubles come. You should remain faithful, even if you are separated for a long time (like when work calls one spouse away form the home for a time). You should stick together even when you find out something that the other person initially hid from you, like their credit card debt. And you should stick together, even when you seem to fight about everything. All that means is that you need help, not that you should give up.

We should love no matter what. We should give second chances. We should forgive. We should show grace. After all, that's what Christ did for us. And that's what our marriage is supposed to resemble.

So what's our problem with commitment? Our problem is that so many of us don't know what it is supposed to look like.  Well, I'll tell you. It's supposed to look like Christ. The better you and yours truly know Him, the better your marriage will be.

It's not easy. It's not convenient. It's not self-serving. Thank God for that.